I told my husband this morning that only he knows the TRUTH about our marriage. He hasn't spoken in years, so he can no longer say he loves me like he used to; I don't think he ever said thank-you for the care I've given him throughout his illness, which has been as long as our marriage.
We never had a normal marriage without his brain illness, so I have no idea how it might have been. I told Vince today that he knows I have loved him because I tell him and I have given him wonderful, devoted care all these years, and he has been made very comfortable despite his inability to do anything for himself. I know that he understands the words I say, even though they probably fly out of his mind as soon as they are said—no short-term memory.
I know there is a TRUTH about our marriage, and I have trusted God that the TRUTH has been great love between Vince and me. But I get so despondent by Vince's inability to communicate any love towards me, so naturally I doubt this TRUTH. Vince knows if he loves me, but I never again will know this, at least on this side of an eternity in heaven when maybe he can tell me.
I told Vince only he and God have the TRUTH about our marriage. I can only hope and guess . . . .
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